Saturday, October 02, 2010

Of the good and bad.

OK, because this is my blog I think I'm allowed to rant all I want.

I guess I shouldn't have been so idealistic about things... honestly, it is very hard to keep positive when problems keep coming up one after the other - and beat you down!!! So today not only did I lose a DP, two of my very good friends also backed out - for reasons that are not valid, and that I absolutely cannot comprehend.

I hate the way film school works - you work on my set, and I will work on yours. Because there isn't an exchange of cold hard cash, everything runs on barter trades. That's why I am so, so disappointed and upset with my classmates - I feel that I have been there to work really hard on their sets and now they can't be on mine... and now I am scrambling to put together a crew, and I'd be lucky if I can even fill the key positions!!! AAAAAAAGH!!!! I'm so stressed out!!

It's so dumb, I wish I could have seen this coming sooner, then maybe I would have been more prepared... I am now more wary of helping out others. It's not a very pleasant feeling when you would not think twice about helping a friend - but they won't do shit for you!!! CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS. Right now I am only so grateful that my producer (and his producing partner - both of who are also my classmates) aren't flaking out... I would be in serious trouble if they did.

I'm so sad :(

I don't know what to do!! I've had enough of New York and its flaky people.
Just frickin tired and sick of it.

:(

off to sleep this heartache away :(