:(

Did you know that when you lay your head sideways in a bathtub, you hear rushing water against your ear. You can almost pretend that you have your eyes closed while the plane is preparing for take off.

And then you're back home, and everything's fine, just stick those band-aids on the broken bits and everything's back to normal and everything is fine again.

Then when the water suddenly starts rushing up and you realize your face is halfway submerged in water and if you don't wake up, don't get up, although you want to lie down in the bathtub and pretend that you're not here, halfway across the world but you're back home and you're near the one you really love and everything is okay you have to bring yourself up before water starts filling through your ears and sting your eyes and clog your nose and you can't breathe and then you rise you choke and then the truth of the reality hits you like a sharp plasma beam -

That this hurts so, so much.
And you can't do anything about it.